Solitude
Ahhhh, 48 hours without talking- a blissful rest. I recently spent a weekend at a beautiful, peaceful retreat center on the ocean. There was amazing food, beautiful gardens (well, they would have been beautiful if it were not in the dead of winter), a labyrinth, and inspiring artwork. Run by the Sisters of Mercy, an international community of Roman Catholic women, the whole environment reflected their commitment to justice and mercy, women’s empowerment, spirituality, and connection to God and nature. These ladies rock the true spirit of Jesus. And their work is a balm to a complicated and fractured society.
Just reading the word, “Solitude” gives me a sense of peace. The irony of being an introvert is that I do really love people, in small doses. My personal battery of energy drains very quickly with a job that demands deeply listening and interacting with my whole self. And what recharges my soul is time alone- in nature, in my quiet home (my fortress of solitude), or even driving in my car in silence. This may sound super uncomfortable for some, but I would argue a few minutes of quiet reflection is just what society needs.
What did I do with all that time alone?
-Watch the sunrise
-Sleep
-Observe the birds
-Contemplate artwork and its meaning
-Notice my breath
-Check in with my feelings (physical and emotional)
-Journal my thoughts and reflections
-Pray
-Savor my coffee
This is the first time in history the majority of people never let themselves be bored. Individuals distract themselves with smartphones, social media, planning, worrying, and all of the details of daily living. But I argue that overworked brains need time to process and reflect on the meaning of personal experiences; to do so brains must be quiet enough to hear.
It was a privilege to take the time for an entire weekend away. I understand family and work obligations are a limiting factor for many, but there are ways to carve out a few moments of solitude.
How to make time for quiet in a busy life:
-Drive in silence
-Put the phone away while in the grocery line
-Take a short walk in nature- without headphones
-Try Mindfulness, centering prayer, yoga or Tai Chi, artwork, journaling or listening to inspiring music
-Daydream
-Look out the window
-Ask me for more ideas!
“In reflection and contemplation, there is an openness to seeing things as they are, not how we think they should be.” ~ Earl E. Bakken Center for Spirituality & Healing
Once you find a few minutes of solitude, reflect one of the following questions:
-What is one good thing about today?
-One thing I am looking forward to?
-Am I using my time wisely on the things that are important to me?
-In what ways am I living true to myself?
-What is one thing I can do to show my love more effectively in my relationships?
-What is one thing I can do to take care of myself physically?
-What is one beautiful thing I noticed today?
-When was the last time I felt strong?
Notice how this brief time in quiet reflection helps to focus and calm the nervous system and mind.
“A man must find time for himself. Time is what we spend our lives with. If we are not careful, we find others spending it for us. It is necessary now and then for a man to go away by himself and experience loneliness; to sit on a rock in the forest and to ask of himself, “Who am I, and where have I been, and where am I going?” The stuff of life ― Carl Sandburg
Resources-
Earl E. Bakken Center for Spirituality & Healing- https://csh.umn.edu/academics/whole-systems-healing/reflective-practices
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain
Susan Cain’s weekly newsletter,” The Kindred Letters.”
Be Well,
-Trish
Thanks for joining us in this place of encouragement and inspiration, A few things you should know: You are loved and complete just the way you are AND you can make small changes in your life to find wellbeing in mind, body and spirit.
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